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I Feel, Therefore I Am
Navigating Emotions by Candlelight
Several months ago, I was hosting a Contagious Vulnerability room on Clubhouse. We were having a rich conversation about navigating big emotions. Lydia, a frequent participant who I’ve come to love and appreciate for her wisdom, shared a beautiful practice she uses with her young daughter when something troubles her. They light a special candle and then sit down next to each other on the couch. She holds her daughter, letting her know that she’s there for her and will sit with her as she experiences her emotions. If her daughter wants to talk about it, she’s there to listen. If she doesn’t, that’s fine too. They sit for as long as she needs and when the daughter is ready, she gets up and blows out the candle, acknowledging and honoring the passing of whatever emotional weather systems she was experiencing.
I was struck by the beauty of this practice and inspired by her enlightened approach to parenting. What a rare and precious gift it is to have someone lovingly hold us and hold space for us as we journey with our emotions, bearing witness and offering whatever type of listening we need.
Growing up WASP
Growing up WASP, we didn’t talk about our feelings much less light candles honoring them. When big emotions burst out of us, we were told to go to our rooms…
