Keep Calm and Fumble the F*ck Forward!

“What counts in life is not the mere fact that we have lived. It is what difference we have made to the lives of others that will determine the significance of the life we lead.” — Nelson Mandela

It’s been a week since I started the difficult conversation around white privilege and two weeks since I started doing the work in earnest to educate myself on issues of race in America.

A friend reflected back to me that she appreciated the previous piece I wrote but said it felt more head than heart. She’s not wrong.

I think in an effort to avoid making mistakes, to avoid saying the wrong thing, to avoid conveying white fragility, to avoid centering myself, I kept my emotions and my heart out of the equation.

It may also have something to do with being uncomfortable. Sitting with discomfort as I experience what is coming up for me in response to all I’m witnessing. Feeling awkward and uncomfortable as I attempt to give voice to and make sense of my authentic experience while it’s all swirling around in me.

My friend Jen Rice has a great piece that speaks to this which I have found insightful and helpful as I navigate this aspect of my personal work.

I always try to write from my heart. It’s where the wisdom lies. And to do justice to what’s alive for me during this stage of my heroine’s journey of transformational soul work, I need to bring my whole heart.

The heart that is speaking now — my heart — is feeling it all. The emotional weather systems…